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There was a gnome who sent ten different puns to friends, in hope that at least one of the puns would make them laugh. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

What do Barn Owl’s serve at parties? Mush’Shrew’ms, ‘Vole’avaunts and Micecream!

What is the colour of the wind? Blew.

If you have 13 apples in one hand and 10 oranges in the other, what do you have?
Big hands.

My wife told me to stop impersonating a flamingo.
I had to put my foot down!

A snail entered a police station and told an officer, “I just got mugged by two turtles. They beat me up and took all my money!” The officer replied, “Why that’s terrible. Did you get a good look at them?” “No sir, it all happened so fast!”

Where do bees go to the toilet?
The BP station.

What do you call a man attacked by a cat?
Claude.

What do you call a woman attacked and eaten by a cat?
Claudette.

Two bats are hanging upside down on a branch. One asks the other, “Do you recall your worst day last year?” The other responds, “Yes, the day I had diarrhoea!”

Why are frogs always so happy? They eat whatever bugs them.